Secondly look at the word choice, I have noticed a lot of want to be poets that have started using raw emotion in there poems. The use of emotions within a poem is not the problem but that it needs to be conveyed poetically rather than in a rant or story form. Look to central themes for comparisons, all kinds of advanced storeys can and should act as an antagonist pair to what is being said. Poetry is no more than words on a page so visually it needs to have an impact on what the reader see's. The use of emotion can then be highlighted by touching on the senses of the body. Lean the reader in by assimilation, if they cant relate it makes it harder for them to connect to the poem and the more advanced comparisons.
Eg of my own poetry:
"So quicken at the world and its plentiful store
Look at the words that I have chosen to display two separate storeys
1 The visual of pearls forming
2 The relation to time in that you can turn your time on earth into a beautiful thing, that your time had value.
3) I have even mentioned not to waste your time and that the world is full of wonders, alter referenced by pearls.
4) Visual nature of work - World, plentiful store,ageing,sands, pearls. -A poem needs to be visual.
Hope this helped.
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